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I’ll just divert all my calls and texts to my wife’s phone and have my son handle all my administrative tasks. I’m also refusing to check email before noon and I decline meetings because they are not productive.
Hang on, my wife just told me my boss says I no longer have to work at all now!
I was thinking that. The first time I saw this I didn’t look closely and thought “yes, this is pretty much how I remember it, except I’d be scared that guy was going to ash out his cigarette in my burger and slap me on the back of the head as he leaves because he’s probably one of my cousins”.