• undergroundoverground@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Its good that people aren’t using Facebook for news but theres a different problem with things like Google, reddit or even here in a way. So, I’m not saying I’m above it but I’m just old enough to remember before everyone was on the internet. I’m sure theres others here too.

    Say you had a friend called dave and he was someone kept coming up wild and ridiculous ideas and believing them. So much so that one day, dave decided that Tuesdays weren’t real. He said it was actually just one long Monday and its a government conspiracy to make us sleep longer.

    Now, back in the d, if he tried to float these ideas with other people at work, home or the pub, he would be told that he was wrong and to go away, in no uncertain terms. He might evem check with experts in the field at Universities, for example, and they would tell him the same thing. Although, probably more politely.

    Now days, dave will just go Google and he’s not going to type “are Tuesdays real?”, like a sucker. No, dave already knows they’re not real, with a deranged certainty. Instead, he types “Tuesdays aren’t real” which neatly takes him to Tuesdaysarentreal.com. There he meets like minded people and is invited sign up to donate and visit their sister site Wednesdaysarentreal.com. Dave had always been skeptical of Wednesday too. So he sighed up to both immediately.

    Being particularly ignorant and outspoken, dave quickly rises through the ranks, eventually taking charge. Once there, he uses the money people have donated to start a political party which draws the attention of the local news, hoping to make fun of them for some easy ratings.

    Hoeever, the clip of daves unhinged rant on the news goes viral which actually end up attracting 10s of 000s of people that never would have heard of them otherwise. The party then becomes self funding and snowballs as businesses see the productivity boost they could have through being able to deny people sleep and the outrage traffic that, in turn, generates.

    Finally, dave takes power and dooms us all to an eternal Monday.

    The 90s and the early 00s had their problems but they also could be magical. You could save the whole world through simple phrases like “fuck off dave you doughnut. Tuesdays are real.”